I could write an Instagram post or a story about how all of us females feel, but then again people would forget how we feel and see it as a trend.
How many times do we have to tell you men how we feel? How many times do we have to voice our horrid experiences that left us with trauma for people to finally say we’re going to change this now?
How many times do we have to put our keys between our hand in the night to feel safe?
How many times do we have to pretend to be nice to a creep to stop them following us home or to work?
How many times do we have to laugh at a sexist joke so we don’t get called sensitive or a snowflake?
No let me finish speaking.
I could speak about my own experiences, but what I want to write about is the way men have been socialised to treat women and how some women have contributed to it.
It’s not just about us walking by ourselves in the night, and not about us leaving out our drinks. It’s about how we’ve been socialised from a small age to treat a female.
I’ve been around a group of men, and hearing how they speak about a woman is disgusting it doesn’t matter to them if they have a mother or sister.
“Rah did you see that? Look how short her shorts her.”
“She’s had more men in that bed than I have had of women in my bed.”
“Your nails are disgustingly long, slags in my area have nails like that, you’re not a slag so why are you wearing that. My female friends also wear fake nails, and they’re insecure people.”
“He was just being nice, you should dance with him.”
“She is a slag for sleeping with another man so quick.”
“I find women annoying, even if I am one they’re just bitchy, this is why I get along with men more.”
“You know you don’t need to wear tops to show your tits all the time.”
“My mum would kill me if I ever wore a top showing my cleavage.”
“You’re a slag for coming home late”
These are the things I’ve heard, and I will admit I’ve been involved for not standing up to this way of thinking. It’s something I’ve had to correct myself and educate myself, I’ve had to leave these types of friendships and relationships to not be influenced with these misogynistic opinions.
We women are also the problem, we let our male friends judge and name call a women and let them treat other females terribly. I’m not going to say imagine if she was your relative, because it would mean we should only empathise a women because of their roles in a family, such as a mother, sister, daughter or a niece.
But I won’t because we’re human beings, we should be treated as equals.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a feminist, you can be the nicest man however we don’t owe you sex.
I want to say not all men. However the issue with that is we’re congratulating you for being a decent human being. That is the bare minimum, what should be happening is, the not all men crowd should correct and educate his male cohorts.
We encourage women to dress however they want it’s they’re body, however when a male relative is at home we have to cover up. Why do we have to cover up if a male relative cannot control himself or sexualises their nieces or daughters? We’ve been sexualised from a young age to dress decent in front of a male relative.
I could go on about how the system has failed to protect women however we all know that.
So how many missing women will it take, until we’re taken seriously? Men, what will you do?
